How to Become Strong

There are many people in this world who are weak. No, I'm not talking about physically weak; I'm talking about mentally weak. People break down far too easily during times of stress, and most people aren't capable of getting over such a breakdown without external aid. However, if we look to the great people of the past, they were all (in Emersonian terms) self-reliant.

Self reliance is a trait that contemporary members of society lack. It is the ability to stand in a crowd without blending in with the sea of conformist ideas and faces. It is the ability to smoothly sail through difficult times with mental fortitude. It is the ability to become one with thy self-- to understand oneself so thoroughly and holistically that no external force can break oneself down. It is exactly what it sounds like: the ability to rely on oneself.

When people lack the mental fortitude necessary to get over rough spots in life, they loose their self-reliance. With the loss of self-reliance comes the loss of integrity, discipline, self-respect, and ultimately, happiness. The loss of self-reliance compels individuals to take drastic measures in order to gain comfort from external sources. This can become problematic in many situations. For example, not being able to deal with an emotional dissatisfaction in a relationship may lead to cheating if one cannot use the strength of the mind to search for solutions that are able to preserve the integrity of a relationship. In the same vein, the inability to psychologically deal with the loss of a job or the absence of a promotion may translate into harmful concrete actions that exacerbate the problem at hand. For the aforementioned situations, a sufficient dose of mental strength would be enough to avoid many of the psychological and physical impacts. Although confiding in others may seem like a viable solution, external sources do not offer the type of help that is commonly needed.  Only by utilizing the power of self-strength can one become truly happy and fulfilled without harming those in close proximity to oneself.

True self-reliance is something that is easy to describe, but extremely hard to attain. However, with the proper dedication and will, self-reliance is within reach for every individual. There are a few beginning steps that one can take on the long journey:

NUMBER ONE: Understand the What and the Why


Be honest with yourself. True change cannot happen unless you understand WHAT changes you need to make and WHY you need to make them. Note that making a list of things you need to change isn't enough. You must understand, from the bottom of your heart, why you are making those changes. It may help to keep a personal diary. This way, you will be able to keep a journal of all your honest thoughts, knowing that no one else will never read them. By being honest with yourself, you are making a compact with yourself to use your own power in the first step of the climb to self reliance.


NUMBER TWO: Do things

There is nothing worse than sitting around and doing nothing. Not only does a sedentary lifestyle suck away physical vitality, it also causes mental vitality to seep away. Occupy yourself with PRODUCTIVE tasks that will either positively impact your future or bring happiness into the life of someone you care about. Menial tasks such as playing video games and sitting around chatting with insignificant people on the internet will only decrease your sense of self worth and compel you to take darker roads.


NUMBER THREE: Engage in Introspection

Many people tend to prematurely rush into the process of making themselves feel better once a personal disaster occurs. They tend to immediately look for comfort in outside sources such as friendships. Not only does this rarely produce any lasting effects, it also inhibits the ability to self-command emotions. Instead, you should take quiet time alone and think about the difficult situation at hand. This quiet time should be free from social networking, technology, etc. This should be a time during which you, and only you, reflect on your life in peace. Take a bubble bath, go on a jog, or even take a long drive with no final destination in mind. Remember: this is a time for introspection, meaning that other people should not be within talking distance of you.

TO BE CONTINUED SOON...